Will I ever learn?

Why do I keep doing this to myself? My Mom has been talking about wanting to see the kids, so this morning I get the bright idea to call her and see if she would like to watch the kids overnight tomorrow. It would give her and the kids a chance to visit for a while, and hubby and I could have a well deserved night off since we've been working so hard, sickness, etc. What's her reaction? Oh she needs to check with her hubby and make sure it's okay. Okay, I would have much preferred " gee, I'd love to see the kids, that sounds great!", but okay whatever. So I talk to her later this evening, she talked to her hubby, and he says it's fine with him, well guess what her answer is " can I get back with you tomorrow morning, and see if I feel okay?" First of all, I have to be in Nashville early tomorrow, plus if the kids are going to go, I have lots of packing to do.

Now I know my Mother has health issues, and you know in reality, her answer SHOULD be just fine, and I could let it go, BUT this is the same Mother who when her other daughter wants her to babysit, which is at least once usually a couple of times a week, and she doesn't even usually asks her, she just tells her she needs her to watch the kids, and you know what, she does it. EVERY time!! I usually only ask my Mom to watch the kids once every 4-8 weeks or so. I am just so tired of this. One of the reasons my Mom is so tired and doesn't feel good is because she's always watching my sister's kids. grrrr

So my dilemna is, should I just suck it up and if she decides she wants to watch the kids, let her, when I know it would make my kids oh so happy, or go with my first instinct ( which isn't a nice idea, and makes me look like a spoiled brat) and just tell her forget it? I could try this method and be nice about it, although knowing me, we would get into a big argument how I feel my kids are not getting the same treatment as my niece and nephew, etc.

I know I should just let it go, but I see my kids going through the same crap that I went through as a child, feeling like they aren't good enough, and the preferential treatment to somebody else. It's not a good feeling, and to top it off, my kids are much better behaved than my sister's kids who wear her out so much, that she hardly has the energy for my kids.

I keep telling myself, that I won't ask her to watch them again, that when she wants to see them, I will say no, but I know my kids for some strange reason, love to go to visit her, and I want to see them happy. sigh.....